Father Forgets

Ok.. In conjunction of fathers' day... I come up with one post.

Listen, son: I am saying this as you lie asleep, one little paw crumpled under your cheek and the blond curls stickily wet on your damp forehead. I have stolen into your room alone. Just a few minutes ago, as I sat reading my paper in the library, a stifling wave of remorse swept over me. Guilty I come to your bedside.

There are the things I was thinking, son: I had been cross to you. I scolded you as you were dressing for school because you gave your face merely a dab with a towel. I took you to task for not cleaning your shoes. I called out angrily when you threw some of your things on the floor.

At breakfast I found fault, too. You spilled things. You gulped down your food. You put your elbows on the table. You spread butter too thick on your bread. And as you started off to play and I made for my train, you turned and waved a hand and called, "Goodbye, Daddy!" and I frowned, and said in reply, "Hold your shoulders back!"

Then it began all over again in the late afternoon. As I came Up the road, I spied you, down on your knees, playing marbles. There were holes in your stockings. I humiliated you before you boyfriends by marching you ahead of me to the house. Stockings were expensive - and if you had to buy them you would be more careful! Imagine that, son, form a father!

Do you remember, later, when I was reading in the library, how you came in timidly, with a sort of hurt look in your eyes? When I glanced up over my paper, impatient at the interruption, you hesitated at the door. "What is it you want?" I snapped.

You said nothing, but ran across in one tempestuous plunge, and threw your arms around my neck and kissed me, and your small arms tightened with an affection that God had set blooming in your heart and which even neglect could not wither. And then you were gone, pattering up the stairs.

Well, son, it was shortly afterwards that my paper slipped from my hands and a terrible sickening fear came over me. What has habit been doing to me? The habit of finding fault, of reprimanding - this was my reward to your for being a boy. It was not that I did not love you; it was that I expected too much of youth. I was measuring you by the yardstick of my own years.

And there was so much that was good and fine and true in your character. The little heart of you was as big as the dawn itself over the wide hills. This was shown by your spontaneous impulse to rush in and kiss me good night. Nothing else matters tonight, son. I have come to your bedside in the darkness, and I have knelt there, ashamed!

It is a feeble atonement; I know you would not understand these things if I told them to you during your waking hours. But tomorrow I will be a real daddy! I will chum with you, and suffer when you suffer, and laugh when you laugh. I will bite my tongue when impatient words come. I will keep saying as if it were a ritual: "He is nothing buy a boy - a little boy!"

I am afraid I have visualized you as a man. Yet as I see you now, son, crumpled and weary in your cot, I see that you are still a baby. Yesterday you were in your mother's arms, your head on her shoulder. I have asked too much, too much.

By W. Livingston Larned

It's just................................ heart touching article....................

Something really spoilt the mood

It's been a long time since last update, a bit waste letting my blog rot here,

Nevertheless I just want to share something to everyone.

I wonder why people here (around me) will look like damn "not-my-type" of people. Today my mood is kinda good, and I expect it's a good day coming. But hey......... things happen

Whenever I step into my office, there's this fella always give the "dulan" face, always telling people that she's not feeling to work... Well... Go home sleep then.... don't come and give the face to people. This kind of people will just spoil the whole environment. Seriously!

What's more important than a start up mood? Stop complaining you earn less and bla bla bla all the shit you can't get due to your incapability. I don't feel the "closeness" among my friend last time. Whatever is norm for me is like "WAH-WOW-Factor" for them...... I'm just being back myself, duh!? You don't want to upgrade yourself then that's your problem what.. I will not stay at the middle class life or whatsoever they call it.. I'm not criticizing the middle class or whatever .. But I do have my own life, I do enjoy chasing the life I want, I will improve, I do read books, I do improve my knowledge, and the list continue....

You may say I'm rich guy which with his brag, but I consider myself as a moderate guy, I guess they just have not see people spending worst than me. Come on!!! People spend what they earn, and that's their freedom. They are capable and don't envy them, don't jealous, you also can do that you see.. It's just that you always think that you can't that's why you can't.

OK hahaha time to go back to work..

Hehehe just want to release some "bad" stuff that I can't let off at anywhere :P

Another Rant

This is a short one though, nothing much but I find that sometimes people are just selfish! Don't you think so? I do think so! END!!

Rant of the Day

Today is definitely not one of my day, I take my leave to help my dad for some shit matter, which has been bothering the whole family for quite sometimes. I can tell one thing about it, do not involved yourself with government shit, they are seriously very troublesome and some of it seriously do not really help you, yet they acclaimed they are the professional in handling it. Just like shit. I have been trying to get reach to this officer for almost a month! SERIOUSLY ONE MONTH! All they do is pass me from one extension to another extension. To be precise, they do not know which matter shall direct to which extension. What's more? The officer always claim that they are not free, I wonder what are they doing until they have no time to answer a call... I think Bill Gates and Steve Jobs are more free than her...

Got back to APIIT to clarify with them about the result.. As usual they will tell you one thing during the orientation and another thing during the assignment period and another thing during the final result. I failed to get 1st class though my average is 75% above, they tell me that my mark falls under Second Upper, due to my best 60 is just 12.75... =.=''''' They never told me that during the orientation and bla bla bla! DUH!! What's more I can do? SHIT them for my sake! Bad management! Bad management!

And when I'm home when I thought of installing everything and update everything from Microsoft. And when installing SP3, HAH CATCHA! Corrupt my whole Windows, WTF!? Spent 2 hours to repair and end up eating Ginkgo. DAMN U! What's more? Reformat lo! DAMN!

-End of Rant-

DAMN DAMN DAMN!!!

What I feel about China Sichuan Earth Quake..

I know my blog has little people reading.. and of course there are only a few people who are close to me read this.. but I hope everyone who read this can spread what I express myself here by either copy and paste or create another article just like this.

Recently I was quite busy with my work and unable to catch up any news around me, til one day my mum told me that Myanmar had a cyclone disaster, the death toll has raised around 78,000 life. We shall be very grateful that our country Malaysia is free from deathly natural disaster. Nothing much seen from the disaster... not much pictures not much information about there.. but then I did donated RM200 for them.

And a day after donating the money... another news come. This time it's China province Sichuan, I thought it's just a normal quake. But after a few days.. I know this is the worst ever disaster happened in China for the past three decades. Have you seen all the people there grieving for the death of their death child? For their dead husband or wife? For their dead parents? For their dead grand parents? Not to mention about your boyfriend or girlfriend.. Not even about your friends... They don't even have the time to think all about their money, house, damaged properties..


See? These people has just not able to express their feeling of sadness. All he knows and able to do is to cry for their dead family member..

Can you imagine that's your brother? I'd imagine.... I'm so helpless..... I have no idea what can I do..

A lovely girl..... gone through all the suffering and has exchanged her face for her life....... Can you feel her? I only able to feel she felt hopeless... Nothing can be done.... I really feel the "sour" in my heart.


What if the injured lady is your mummy? I cry when thinking of that....................... I'm not sure how can I live on..... If it's really happen to me..

Have you ever thought of how good and how lucky we are staying here in Malaysia? Yet I see many people complaining how bad how worse is Malaysia. They always claim that Malaysia is hopeless, but let's see again. Do you think our land is the best place to live in? At very least we escaped any earth quake, cyclone, heavy rain, heavy snow, and no tsunami. What's more we can complain more? Even I give you a million now, and all your family member are dead. Are you happy? Can you live on?


With China's one child for a family. Now their child is dead............... They have no one else to accompany them for the rest of their life....

This sobbing man is hoping that her daughter can recover from her unconsciousness, can you see how these innocent child taken away from the cruelty of natural disaster? They have no mercy at all. No tolerance at all............

Do I need to say more?

For those who always waste their food..... Please read the sentence below the above picture...

If you can't see... I'll re-type it...

"A girl sleeping in her father's arms holds an egg after walking more than ten hours to the safest area, May 16, 2008 in Dujiangyan, one of the hard-hit cities, of Sichuan, China."

People are still complaining Kuala Lumpur has nothing to eat... be grateful that we are now full in stomach.

Next Monday is wesak day, let's pray for the dead... May them rest in peace. Most importantly please DONATE to these victim of natural disaster. Please........... Even RM1.00 count. Why are we not able to donate to these people while we can spend RM1,000.00 for a trip, spend RM1,500.00 for a phone or camera? Spend RM1,500.00 for paying up loan for our car loan? Can't we spend for them too? I'm donating RM500.00 already. Please help. Donate for these poor people. They need our help desperately....................


Please copy and paste or write an article to encourage people to donate for these poor victim...

Disclaimer: I wrote this without receiving pay from any organization and all the images are taken from New York Times website without permission.

The HTML code of this article can be downloaded here

iPhone~~~~ and Random Post

Hahaha I bought an iPhone!!

LOL Though very late post, at least I post! I think it's almost 3 weeks now. Firstly it's awesome, then I find it troublesome, then I like it once again :P

1. I find it's awesome because it has only one button and everything is touch screen! Isn't that cool!? You tell me.. how many phone out there got such function? And most importantly I got it cheap! Very Cheap! Tell me what kind of phone you can get for RM 1354? Mostly are just lousy low end phone. Correct? Even the shaker phone from SE cost around RM1.4k.

2. I find it troublesome because it has too little function by default and you have to install every single thing for additional function. That's............ troublesome. Of course it lack of quite a bit of functions such as 3G, 2nd camera for video call, and cannot forward sms (of course there are quite a bit more) bla bla bla

3. I love it because it's really cool and after I installed all the additional function, it rocks!!! LOL Imagine watch CJ7 on iPhone, cool right? LOL IM on iPhone, cool right? EXTREMELY COOL!

It's it cool? Cool right? LOL I took these pic with my old phone S700i. And now my beloved S700i is not has become my alarm. HAHA a RM2.2k alarm phone (before depreciate) .

Yesterday was my company annual dinner and we have the dinner at Shangri La hotel, Lemon Garden Cafe. Quite nice I have to say, but not as nice as Gen Japanese Restaurant.

The restaurant: Lemon Garden Cafe

I feel that I leng zai d! LOL

The admin clerk at my office, was actually wanted to capture the environment instead

This is how it looks like, outside is even nicer! Very romantic.

The yummy seafood! I like the prawn there! juicy!

You may go try but I say it's just not worth the price we paying for.. but since boss paying who cares?

Some of the random pic from iPhone, hehe

What else? At the same place doing the same thing lo..

Isn't she's cute? HAHAHA

What have I did? Rounding?

It almost three months since working, what have I gain from working there? Do I really want to do programming? I am lost actually, it might be true like how he says, I do need to learn from ground up but then how long more can I sustain?

Today he shows me another great portfolio resume, he's two year elder than me, but have tonnes of experience that I don't have! Whatever you can think of, he has it. That really motivate me to surpass him in 2 year?

Nothing to crap more....